With All My HeartSchool

!!!!!NEWS!!!!!

2009-11-20T10:34:00.000-08:00

WE'RE MOVING!!!!!!!!!

Ah! I'm SO very excited!

God has been so good to us, even in the hard things. This year has been the biggest stuggle, and yet the biggest blessing (besides the people in our lives) is going to happen at the end of this year! Last Christmas we were on concrete floors and this Christmas we will be visiting my mom and coming home to a NEW HOME!

Not only is this a new home for us, it's my dream come true. We wanted to move into a house as soon as we were married, but that just didn't happen and instead we lived in an apartment for a year. Then, when we went house shopping, the only thing we could afford that wasn't junkie, was a townhome. I'm not very fond of townhomes; not that there's anything wrong with them, they're just not my thing. I like big backyards and one story seperate houses. But we have lived in this town home for 8 years. Eight very LONG years. We have tried to move twice before, packing everything up and ready to move and it just never worked. Depressing!!

This time was different. There was a change. God wasn't giving us hints to stay, he was whispering 'get ready', 'take the Promised Land', 'Claim your blessing'! Every sermon, every prayer, every song on the radio was saying to us to move forward. This might seem like a coincidence to some, but knowing the ways in which he spoke to us before to stay put, this was a major turning point for us. Not only have we "heard" move forward, but everything is falling in place so perfectly. It was SO hard when the answer was "no" because we've never liked living here, but now that the answer is "yes" we can see why HE said to wait!! God knows, people! He really does! The house we are moving into is exactly my dream home; older house (character, I hate cookie cutter), enormous back yard, stone exterior, 4 bedrooms, large kitchen, both formals and den, 3 bathrooms, etc! It is perfect. Not only is it the perfect house for US, it's the perfect house for our children. They will live two doors down from one set of grandparents. Amazing are the plans that God has for us; really really, beyond amazing!!

Thank you Lord. Thank you FATHER!!

A Year since Hurricane Ike!

2009-09-28T10:52:00.000-07:00

When we ripped out the carpet right after hurricane Ike, just over a year ago, here is what our living room looked like:

This is our new living room, most of the work done by my husband and I. We hired someone to put in the new sheetrock, but the floor and painting were us. The bookshelves have since been cleaned off and my grown up books put on them. The kid's books and school stuff have been put in the new school room. I also have a better lamp in the corner from mother's day, it just didn't get in this picture.

Same room, different viewpoint. The new door was put in by my sweet husband. If you notice, there's a tile still missing in this picture, but it's there now and complete:

This is the after Hurricane Ike picture of our laundry/extra room. The carpet was all moldy and had to be taken up. The ceiling leaked and it was pretty iky in there.

This is the same room, amazingly! We put in new ceiling, crown molding, paint, and tile. Now it is a useful room! It's air conditioned now, as well, so we were able to make it into a school room for the children. They LOVE it!

I decided to revisit my blog after being away for quite sometime. I read every post since I started this blog and sat and cried over some of the memories. It's hard to believe it's been a little over a year since our lives were turned upside down by Ike. So much has changed since then!! Our tile is in downstairs, the walls are all finished, the back room is completely remodeled, and we've only got minor repairs to finish (a little painting, etc.).

The sadness over the past year has sat heavy on me, but I've grown in patience and in being content. I've learned a great deal about myself, some good and some bad, but most of all that the Lord is always changing and growing me and that if I'm to thrive, I must get on board with His plans and stay there.

One thing that is surprising me, is what change the Lord is putting in our lives right now! (No, I'm not pregnant). But, I can't really blurt it to the world just yet, either. It's very exciting to see what God is doing, though, and I'm waiting patiently for what's happening. Hopefully in posts to come, I will be able to expand on what's happening in our lives at the moment--a true dream come true in the making!!

Winter and Beauty

2008-12-14T11:18:00.000-08:00

This was going to be the worst Christmas ever--I just knew it! I cried and basically threw an adult fit. I hated that it had been months since the hurricane hit, and we were still living on concrete floors with holes in the laundry-room ceiling. I had been depressed the first few weeks after we came home, but I had eventually grown accustomed to sweeping bland concrete and pulling bits of sheetrock that were stuck near the wall out and trashing them. I was learning why people with dirt floors bothered to sweep. I was proud of myself for growing in this area, and then Thanksgiving was over.
Suddenly Christmas was not a dream in the distance, but sat right at our door. I knew for the first time since the hurricane, that it was too late to have a brand new floor in and walls newly painted before Christmas. I usually have no problem thanking God for the little things, but I am ashamed to say, I told God exactly what I felt. Letting it all out felt good, and after it was over I knew God loved me anyway and that all children complain sometimes. Then I began to thank God even though I didn't feel like it. Thank you Lord that my children are healthy, and thank you that my husband has a good job and loves his family, and on it went, getting easier all the time. I still hated it, but I knew I must except that Christmas this year would be on a concrete floor.
It took us a long time to even go buy our tree--we usually buy it right after Thanksgiving. Then, all we did was pull out the ornaments so the children would have a decorated tree. It was nothing like a normal Christmas, where I'm known to decorate even my dining room table and put a nativity in the bathroom. Not this year. But almost every night, I sat up late staring at the tree and crying. Why did this Christmas have to be this way? Then I asked God, "Please, God, I really need a good Christmas". And the miraculous happened. It Snowed in Houston!!!!!!
It was Dec 10. That night, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God loved me! All those Christmases as a child, growing up where it snows, He knew what I missed. It was the best Christmas gift I could have gotten. God gave me a Christmas present. I can imagine that lots of people felt this way! Thank you Jesus. I've always known that Christmas was not supposed to be about decorations or presents, but I most the time get so wrapped up in it that I forget. This year, I was so depressed, that I wasn't thinking much about it being perfect, and God poured out His love on us.
The day before Christmas, the children went shopping with Daddy for some last minute things. The living room was a wreck, because I hadn't cared to clean it up and presents were still unwrapped. But, a peace fell on me as I was alone in the house. I got up, turned on some Christmas music and busied myself. Christmas might not be decorative, I told myself, but the least I could do was make the room look tidy. So, I spent the better part of that day, organizing, picking up, cleaning, sweeping our concrete floor, spreading out a red sheet, and setting the presents out nicely. That day, I really experienced what Christmas was about. It's about Love.

Snow Day, Dec 11:

If you can imagine, this next picture (with them wearing short sleeves) was Christmas day:
Early Christmas morning:

Later that Evening:

What our living room looked like Christmas morning:

If you would like to see more pictures of our Christmas, you can visit my daughter's blog at www.abbyshowandtell.blogspot.com .

2008-11-04T08:24:00.000-08:00

We had a really great birthday party this year. The weather was beautiful, and outside was the perfect place for us to hold it. Usually we have the birthday parties at our house, but because Nana and Papa's house wasn't damaged in the storm, they graciously held the party at their house. We had a blast!

We've never spent a whole lot of money on birthday parties, but this year we were considering a party at Jumping Jungle. We asked Abigail if she would rather us spend money on a big party at Jumping Jungle or if she wanted a big present this year. She chose the big present. I only spent about $40.00 total on the party, buying the decorations and party favors at the Dollar Tree and making the cake ourselves. We usually don't have the money for a huge present, but this year we used the reimbersment from our insurance for groceries lost, and bought a big present with it. It took me a long time to sale shop for the amount of groceries lost, but I knew I could build it up again and she wouldn't have another chance for such a glorious birthday present that her Daddy was especially keen on buying for her. What a Dad!!!!

Here's my homemade creation:

And here is her BIG surprise!

We sang Happy Birthday and blue out the candle. She loved all of her presents that our guest graciously brought. She was excited about each of them!

The children loved the party and had great fun, but even the adults and teens enjoyed the family fun!

After the party the fun continued. We took a full day off to open and enjoy each present and to go to McDs for lunch. Her favorite present (that you can play with indoors) was her Butterfly Barbie!

Hurricane Ike

2008-10-30T12:36:00.000-07:00

As you can see, it's been a while since I posted. It didn't end up being a tragedy for us, although we had family members who were hit much harder then us. We were effected, though, and it's been really hard to be patient about it all. We had roof damage, sheet-rock damage downstairs, and all of our downstairs carpet had to be ripped up. The insurance company came through for us, but we're still waiting for the money to be available. It's a lot more waiting than I anticipated. We've been wanting to move for several years now, so this might end up being a blessing in disguise for us, but we're still waiting to see how it all plays out. We really want to fix this place up to rent and move to a house with a backyard. That's our dream--a house with a back yard.

The hurricane that might head our way, turned into a manditory evacuation. We brought files, a bag of toys for each child, and pictures. That was about it, other than what we needed on hand to stay with Mamaw. Here we are, packed in the car, ready to go.

Mamaw's house is very cozy, but it was even cozier with 10 people and a dog staying in her little house. The kids thought it was great, and we all did fine.

Driving back in was surreal. There were piles of wood (looked like stacked firewood) outside of corporations, sheets hanging in trees, fences totally gone, a gas station twisted into an "x" shape, and less than 5 miles from our house we had to drive under this:

Getting even closer, it was pretty scarry. This was a house two doors down from us. Fema and their insurance both turned them down! It was surprising to me how many people I know found out their insurance was a fraud. Both of my sisters who live near me found out that even though they were sending money through their mortgage to a big name insurance, that they were not covered after all--and "Oops" was all they could say to them. Fema also turned them down, even though one of them had to have their house gutted.

This was our neighbor's shed:

This was the inside of our living room after taking out the wet, moldy carpet. The water literally blew in through cracks in the doors and windows. Our white board that stays hung on the wall next to the door was completely warped from it:

Our next door neighbor's little girl, who's Abby's best friend, lost her swingset. It was scattered out all over the field. They tried to find all the peices, but a few vital things were missing. They played on the peices until the guys hauled them off.

The kids recieved some unplanned education as we ripped out some huge peices of sheet-rock.

We kept the children upstairs for a couple of days while we took up nails and tackboard, etc. By the time we got through making the place remotely safe, they were restless and were begging to help. Sweeping and carrying cushions was about the only thing safe we could find for them to do, but for them it was a much needed break from their room.

Attack of the Kisser Mama:

Please pray for my sisters and all those effected by Hurricane Ike. I'm so ready to get back to a normal life again, whatever that means. We praise God that our insurance came through. It just seems like such a long wait for the money to actually become usable. Please pray that it will cover all that needs to be done, and that my sister's mortgage company will pay for their mistakes. You would hardly believe the amount of people that this has happened to--people paying their insurance through their mortgage company, trusting that it was reliable, and now find out their hard earned money has somehow vanished into thin air.

"First" day of Kindergarten

2008-08-28T14:53:00.000-07:00

We've been doing school for a while now, but I had forgotten to take some first day pictures. I guess we've been doing school stuff with her so long that all the days just blend one into another, and I forget that this is her first official year of school. While I taught her to read last year, she wasn't old enough to enter school yet anyway, so we never had to keep records. We did keep some, but only for my own sake as a sentimentality. This year is the first year the records are important for other reasons than just a keepsake.

So, I dressed them up this morning, let them plant their beans (science project for this week), and take some pictures with their new backpacks. They were so cute showing off their new stuff!

This is Abby! She's going to be a big Kindergartener this year and I'm so very proud of her. She learned basic reading skills last year and can write any word that you show her legibly. She'll be doing Sonlight Core K this year and supplimenting with P 4/5 so that we won't get too far ahead in the fun read alouds. She loves to play house/kitchen and loves being outside. She's a little shy, but loves to play with the kids in her Sunday school class. We'll be moving to the Kindergarten Sunday school class this coming Sunday, and she's a little nervous about the change, but I'm sure she'll be fine when she realizes it's the same kids, just a different teacher and room.

On the left is my younger student, Abram (otherwise known as Little Bub or My Little Superman). He is a ham and a half, as can be clearly seen in this picture. He's not 'in school' yet, but we read storybooks from Sonlight P3/4 when he's in the mood to settle in a snuggle with Mama for a good book. He loves to fly around the house in his Superman cape and will be caught wearing his Superman shirt not ten minutes after I've dressed him in the morning. I have to sneak it to the washing machine when it gets dirty, lol!

Here are the children with their new backpacks. Since they don't really need backpacks, we just stuff them full of markers, crayons, spiral notebooks, coloring books, etc that they can play with whenever they want to learn on their own.

These are the children's bean plants from their Science project. Abram is almost always involved in the Science projects. He feels very left out if we don't let him--but that doesn't happen often. His bean plant is actually taller than Abby's so far, and he planted it himself. They are both very proud of their plants.

And here is our sweet Abby playing school after her school day is already over. She actually taught herself to write by playing school. She loves to write--takes after her Mama I guess. She puts together her own books and tells little made up stories to us. Very precious.

Routines and Planners

2008-08-22T14:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, I have to admit, routines and planners are NOT natural for me!! I love to display them in my home, lol, but I rarely put them to good use. However, I've been following the flylady babysteps for the last week, and I have to say--My home looks AWSOME!! There are definitely places I still need to work on, but the overall look of my home is clean and tidy, and it's all thanks to a Godsend--Flylady. But her next step is to add a control journal and routine to my life. Rrrr. I love the idea, but they've never worked for me before. I do have to admit though, that I've never consistently MADE myself use one for long enough to tell whether it would work or not.

I bought a Franklin Planner a couple of months ago in a last ditch effort to get myself organized, and I maybe have one week total used. BUT, I have an entire year of blank daily planning pages staring at me--hince, my new control journal. I did not spend that much on a planner to LOOK organized!!! I need to use it, and since control journal is my next babystep, my Franky is going to get some good use--hopefully.

I will be using my Franklin as a purse, with everything in it, so that I will be forced to carry it everywhere with me. Actually, I'm already in that habit. Next, I'm going to write down a simple morning and evening routine, and put it under tab 1 in my planner. Then...huh, I'm going to actually start USING my planner. Am I a nerd or what?

So, off I go to admire and get aquainted with my Franky!

Words are Seeds

2008-08-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

I believe that every word we speak, hear, or read is a seed. Whether or not the seed produces fruit has to do with a few things--whether it is planted (understood), watered (meditated on), etc. But I do believe that words themselves are very powerful. I want you to consider a few verses from the Bible:

Luke 8: 11--"Now the parable is this: the seed is the word of God"

Matthew 4: 4--"But He answered and said, "It is written, 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.'"

Matthew 12: 36-37--"But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned."

John 1: 1 --"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God."

If words are truly important, if they effect us to the degree that the Bible claims they do, than why do we toss them around so freely? And why do we allow so many words to come our direction that are useless junk?

I am ready to not only declutter my Stuff, but the Words that are around me. I am in awe, seriously, to think of how many words are around me! Thinking alone of the paper clutter of ads, envelopes, bills, and letters is overwhelming, than add to that e-mails, t.v., movies, blogs, websites, and the conversations around us. Wow! I couldn't begin to count the number of words that sit in my home alone, not to mention the words everywhere I visit.

Now don't take this and start telling people to shut up because you're not going to listen to their endless chatter anymore (although, that's very tempting). However, I am going to start a purging process of the Word Clutter around me! I want time to read words that build me and my family up, words that give us peace and joy, not that put fear in us or shame, or that give us a bad attitude!

What kind of words do you want planted in your head? Seriously!

It's really no wonder we are so depressed, stressed, and confused!! Look how many different messages we get every day--buy this, no this, no don't buy anything at all, throw out, bring in, give it a chance, give that up, give that to me....and I could go on a thousand years. Messages. Are they good, are they worthy? Are they needed?

Purge your life of the words that tear down, shame, put fear upon you, confuse you, entice you wrongly, tempt you beyond what you need, lie to you, and cause you pain, and I believe you and I will have a renewed mind!

Philippians 4: 8--"Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things."

What Keeps Me Going

2008-08-18T21:52:00.001-07:00

I had no idea how much I would get done using Flylady's system! I feel like I've been lazy half the day and yet I have so much done because I'm doing it in little spurts! Tonight I just want to show you a few pictures that inspire me.

These are the people in my life that keep me going:

Organizing the School Room

2008-08-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

I don't exactly have a seperate school room, but I want to do school at our dining room table. I have nice black shelves to organize everything on, a storage closet for all the extra supplies, and then my desk for me. I'm going to be working on organizing these areas and a notebook for Abby's school work. I'll be updating this post as I organize stuff.

The challenge--to do all this without buying any more stuff. I already have curriculum, of course, but I'm always tempted to buy new containers. I do not have the money to do that right now, so that's my challenge.

Here's the finished school room:

And a closer view of the school shelf where I organize all our school materials and curricula:
(I'm actually surprised at how much we've accumulated over the last few years. All but the bottom two shelves is all school stuff I use on a daily or weekly basis, with little exception).

Our Morning

2008-08-15T11:42:00.000-07:00

Recently Abby adopted a little dog from her Aunt Becka, who knew how much Abby adored her (a little Shih tzu named Star). I told her that she would be her responsibility, but had yet to make that happen. But a few days ago, I began allowing abby to cut up the garlic after finding a really great plastic knife. We use garlic in our dog food to keep the buggies away (fleas don't like the taste of garlic, or something, cause she has far less when we use it). Then Abby mixes the garlic in a spoonful of wet dog food and then adds the dry food to it. Quite a chore, but she is so proud of herself for "cooking" like Mama for her baby.
After our morning rush of juice cups, dog feeding, breakfast, etc, my entire morning was full of only one main goal--Clean the bathroom!! I was desperate. It STUNK! I can NOT handle a stinky bathroom. So, yesterday I took some before pictures, since before pictures are so much fun. Then I finished cleaning the bathtub, toilet and sinks this morning. Here are some before and after pics for ya'll to ooh and ahh about out there. I'm seriously flabbergasted at how dirty and messy things get so fast.

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Shining my kitchen sink

2008-08-13T21:51:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday may have been my first day as a "Flybaby", but I was still on shinning my kitchen sink today. So, for me this is still day 1. Here's some pictures of me shinning my kitchen sink using Flylady's instructions.

I forgot to take before pictures for this, so here's a picture of the same sink on a normal day in our house. This was several months ago:

Emptied Kitchen Sink and started the HOT water

Bleach water on each side

Scrubbed it down good, even in the crevices

Abby cleaning her kitchen sink

Very proud of the results

And even Bubby joined in the fun

The Results!

Day 1 as a FlyBaby

2008-08-12T22:21:00.000-07:00

So, I just joined flylady--even the forums and stuff! I'm really looking forward to seeing if this truly works for a person as scatter-brained as I can sometimes be. Truly, if this works for me, it will work for anyone.

The first assignment was to clean my kitchen sink. Would you like to see my pretty kitchen sink?

Ta Da!

New Home Management

2008-08-12T08:20:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, that even though I would like to be one of those 'natural' homemakers (who have dreamed of being a stay at home mom since they were born, lol), I am soooooo Not that kind of person. I am so blessed and so glad that I ended up being a SAHM, but I don't know if I ever thought or dreamed about being one, at least not since I was very little. (Psst, whisper, I have often told people that's what I've always dreamed of being--so that they wouldn't try to convince me not to be. I know, sorry, it was a big fat lie!) I repent. I'm not lying anymore. I wanted to be a Marine Biologist, a Vet, a Nurse, a Missionary, a Youth Minister, and a Draftsman, amoung other things. I guess when you've always been raised by moms who worked, you never really think of staying home with your kids as being an option. Actually, somewhere along the road, I picked up the opinion that SAHM were lazy wives of rich men! Wow! Did God hide this stinkin' thinkin' away in the back of my brain until now so that He could get me so used to being home that I never considered the alternative? Anyway, I just wanted to get that confession off my shoulders. So, it's out. Everyone (at least in blogworld) knows that I'm not the Suzy Homemaker type! I wish I were--but that would so not be true.

All that to say, the other day I was just in tears, and couldn't figure out why. Have you ever done that? I think it's a woman thing. But the more I talked (or more like yelled) at my poor hubby, the more the truth came out. I didn't know why I felt so worthless, so lazy, and so inadequate. I was jealous of him for being able to go to work everyday, even though I didn't want to change that. But I felt so lazy for not contributing financially! I was just up in a swarm of emotions, and through the tears and snot (I couldn't seem to find enough kleenex), I finally figured out what was wrong with me. I had caught that lie that woman who stayed at home were lazy wives of rich husbands, and because we weren't rich, I felt guilty and like I was doing something wrong. (Of course, my dhubby, who was the oldest of 8 and always had his mom at home, was totally mad at the 'lunatics' who had put such a lie in my head). My dear husband went out of his way to explain to me how much he thinks I'm worth to this family, and that I had a more important job than he had since I was the one that would shape their future. What a sweet guy, huh?

But here's the thing--I am a mess. A real, like not joking, MESS! My dishes are never completed, my floors have scraps of paper and things that have fallen off of an overstuffed trashcan, my bedroom is stacked high with clean but unfolded laundry, and even my stairs have scattered peices of items that never made there way up the stairs. (I even figured out why I keep things a mess: When everything is done and clean, I actually realize that there's nothing more to me than that. Not that that's true either, but at least I figured it out.) So, even though knowing this doesn't change the way I feel, it does change my perspective to knowing that how I feel is way off from the truth. I am worthwhile as a mother! I'm not lazy just because I don't have a paying job! And I am Not inadequate just because I haven't proven myself in the business world!

So, after this therapy session with my dear husband, we calmed down and went back to normal, and then he blurts something about wanting me to make decisions about the house without always coming to him! (He did not mean financially, so that no one's mistaken. He meant like to organize the way I wanted and really manage the home.) So, even though most people would not be surprised, I was! I have always taken submission to my husband very seriously, even though I have often failed miserably. But anyway, and I don't know where this part of my thinking came from (my step-dad, maybe), that I'm only supposed to do what I'm told or what I know will be okay. So, I always thought that Josh was the 'manager' of our home, and I would just do what I thought he wanted me to--but since he never tells me what to do, it seemed as if I were always lost. I know what you're thinking--this girl is really messed up. But some of this thinking is only just surfacing, so even though I've been acting like that all along, I didn't know why I was acting that way, if you know what I mean. So, I found out that my husband was frustrated at me because I wasn't being a manager of our home and always coming to him for every little descision. So, now, even though my husband thought this all along, I know I am the true manager of my home, which does make me feel a little more important. So, I know I'm babbling, but I had to get that all off my chest, so to speak.

So, now I'm trying to decide how I'm going to manage my home. I've set up a home management notebook, but I think I'm going to go check out Flylady.com and see if that would work for me. So, too-da-loo! Off I go to check out flylady.

Finding Myself

2008-08-10T20:28:00.000-07:00

I want to laugh (or cry) when I hear those words--"Oh, I just need to take some time and find myself". Do you know how common it is becoming for women, as well as men, to leave their families because of that very excuse? Well, I found myself, and I hated what I found!!! But most people who say that they want to find themselves, don't actually mean that they want to find out the truth about themselves. What they really mean, is that they want to lose all worries and indulge in whatever selfish desires present themselves. (I don't like the feelings I'm facing, so instead I'm going to indulge in say, a vacation from work, so that I can feel good, or get away from the family so that I don't have to face how mean I really am). If you really want to 'find yourself', it's not going to be fun! It's going to be hard and painful. The more I see the truth about myself, the more I see how wretched I am--how in need I am of a Savior. Isn't that supposed to be what we find?

Matthew 5: 3 and 4--
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted."

How true have those words become to me!!! How full of experience. Sometimes, I wonder how long I will be 'poor in spirit' before finally being completely free, or how long I will mourn before being comforted. That's not to say that I have not made progress. I have come through many walls in my life, only to find more. I have gone through deep pain in my soul and been comforted over and over again, and then faced a new kind of pain, usually worse and deeper than before. But each time, I draw nearer to what God wants me to be, a little freer and a little wiser. Drawing closer to God does not mean all flowers and bliss. It comes with much promised tribulation.

I think we are being decieved about what is good. People glorify the strength of a person, but God says that He is strong when we are weak. Could all of this tie together? Could it be that Jesus truly understood something that we are unwilling to face? Are the poor in spirit truly blessed? What if being depressed is a 'good' thing, not a bad? What if we are trying to stop something with drugs that is necessary in order to progress beyond ourselves? What if we can find true and perminent healing through our suffering? (That's not to say that sometimes people need medicine to function until they can face reality. Please don't hear me wrong.)

I don't really know. This is just something I've been pondering lately.

I've just been in a lot of pain in my life, and it does help to know that maybe there is some meaning in some of it. And just so you know, I do NOT believe that pain and suffering come from God--I just believe He brings us through the pain caused by the enemy in order to bring truth and healing.

Am I Weird or What??

2008-08-09T11:46:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I really want to know--is every mom out there like this?

I was taking random pictures of my house the other day, cause I like having pictures to look back on later about how I lived. I have improved in some areas, and in other's have gotten worse. But still, I like to know. So, anyway, I was going around the house taking pictures--and I started laughing at myself! I promise these pictures were all taken at the same time.

First picture: My counter looks pretty bad, even though I did dishes the day before last. I know, I know, I'm supposed to do dishes after every meal, or at least every day--but that's just not reality. So, here's what my kitchen counter looks like most days.

But, than, look at the inside of my pantry cabinet, where I keep almost all of my dry goods! NOT BAD! It's not like I just organized it. It's been months since I looked through and weeded out. And yet, surprisingly, it looks pretty good, wouldn't you say? Compare that to my counter!

Than, Groan! Look at my dining room table!!!!! Ugh!
But...not 4 steps away is my spotless (this day) bathroom. Ha, lol! Now I'm really beginning to think I'm weird. Why in the world would I make my bathroom look perfect and completely clean, and leave my dining room table looking like that? Why would I make sure the inside of my counter looks that good, but not just do a few dishes once a day?

This was not just these few pictures. This was a regular occurance all over my house! I had spots of perfection, and places of absolute chaos. Why??? What is it about me, that I don't just expend the same amount of energy to get it all just mildly picked up, instead of perfect in some areas, just to abandon other areas all together? Ugh! I don't understand my own behavior. Anyone want to enlighten me?

I Hate Summers

2008-08-07T09:49:00.001-07:00

It's not the heat that bothers me, really! It's all of the events that get crammed into 2 1/2 months. I really need to clean up my kitchen today, but then again our library books are overdue and I need to return them. At least this time, the summer reading program prize will be a free little book (which in my opinion is far more a reward than a piece of paper that says you get a free Golden Corral meal). Okay, I have to make fun of this for a minute. Aren't ALL MEALS free to a child??? Why in the world would they think it some kind of BIG treat to get to eat out at a place like Golden Corral? Oh, yeah, Sweetheart, isn't that salad and steak wonderful! Wouldn't it have been more appropriate to get, say, a McDs G.C. or a free ice cream certificate? Anyway, not all of the prizes were that lame--I just didn't get that one. My children really don't get the summer reading program thing. They're read to several times every day. It doesn't even faze them to read more stories. They just think that when they go to the library during the summer, they get a little toy for some reason, and then even though they keep reading after the summer's over, they don't get a thing for it after that. (Actually, they do, but not from the library). I don't know why I'm complaining really--it's not like I'm being forced against my will to go. I just consider it such a waste of our time.

Really, I'm just party-ed out!!! We've been invited to countless parties, events, programs, etc. I'm so ready for summer to be over so that everyone will leave my hermit self alone. I could so crawl in my hole and never be seen again--and be perfectly content. But then, that wouldn't be good for the children, so I make my way into public places and grin and bear it. Don't think I'm anti-social, I'm actually a very social person. But I don't do good in crowded or unfamiliar places. I would rather be visiting at someones house. (By the way, I'm the one who was public schooled most of the way through! My husband's much more able to handle public places and he was homeschooled most of the way though. Funny, huh?) Anyway, enough of my rant.

A few pictures to share with you. A tropical storm blew through here, and we took some pictures. Can you tell we were worried??

Introducing Myself: First Post

2008-08-06T09:10:00.000-07:00

I wish I could tell you that I come to Blogger with a basket full of wisdom to share with the world, or tips on how to be a better you, but honestly I am hopelessly flawed. I do love God, I am a Disciple of Jesus Christ (first and foremost), I do love what I do, and I try my best, but somehow I fail over and over and over again. My hope is that when I look back through my life, there will always be a constant improvement, a moving forward--that I can see God working in and through my simple life. But, if you are reading this, looking for the answer to life's big questions, the catch all secret to life and happiness, than I can only tell you to stop reading my blog and everyone else's blog, and start reading God's Word. On the other hand, if you come here to read about real life, struggles, small successes, hurts and pains, joys and tears, you are in the right place: So Welcome! Please share your story with me as well. I love life AND I hate life, I am full of joy, and full of pain, full of God, and sometimes still feel full of shame. God is working on me, though, chiseling away at my hard heart, weeding out those sins and worries that keep popping up, and giving me abundant grace to push on another weary day.

One of the biggest joys in my life is homeschooling!!!! To me, there is nothing that brings me greater joy than to see the eyes of my children light up with a revelation of understanding--whether it be a math concept or God's Word. And even though I have been teaching my children from the time they were born, this is our first official year in homeschooling our oldest (Abigail-5yrs). Abigail has been somewhat of my guinepig. I have actually already taught her to read most simple words, and we're almost finished with Singapore Math K, but this will be the first time that record-keeping will be serious.

We have been researching, testing out different materials and methods, and just plain playing school for the past 5 years, and now that she is of age to start school, we have finally decided. It will be Sonlight for us--we LOVE this curriculum!!!! I will try to put a link on the side of this blog for anyone interested. We will be going primarily at Abigail's own pace, moving forward in the areas that are easy for her, working slowly on challenging subjects, and praying our way all the way to graduation!

The homeschooling decision for us was not a light one! We are Homeschooling with all of our Hearts!!!!! We are actually 2nd generation homeschoolers in that my husband graduated from homeschool, and I homeschooled for a couple of years. We experienced both public school and homeschool, we've prayed about it since we were married 8yrs ago, and we've researched extensively. We know beyond a shadow of doubt that this is the life God has set before us--His Path for our family. (This does not mean, however, that we believe that God has set this path before all people--so please don't feel judged by us if this is not the lifestyle God has planned for your family). We are confident that the homeschool adventure is a long stretch from beginning through graduation for our children, and I'm here to blog through that adventure.

Let me share some pictures with you of our family, past and present:

Now, just let me say,

"Welcome to our world of full-time, year around, homeschooling from the heart!"